© nikonomad | stock.adobe.com

A while back I was attending an annual opening meeting for a marketing group in Orlando, Florida. I love meetings like this where I get to learn about new ideas, listen to great speakers and connect with friends and new acquaintances.

But then, there was “that guy.”

You know the type. This is the kind of guy who thinks a business gathering is all about “getting the word out” about his stuff, what he is doing and what is important to him. Ugh! This guy I met only talked about what he did in his work as a graphic artist. He talked about how he is a great designer, how he knows what is right for a website, and how he is the one to help a business.

This guy didn’t have a clue about what I did. As he left he shoved one of his cards at me (never asking about me or requesting one of mine) and said, “Well, if you need a graphics art person, I’m your guy.” Then he turned to victimize some other poor, hapless soul.

Perhaps you’ve seen this type before. This narcissistic person thinks the world revolves around him and his interests. Real networking, when done properly, is more about connecting with others and building solid relationships. When done right, the connection can help you as you help others.

Networking is about connecting. When you’re simply broadcasting and “trying to get the word out” about you, without caring for others, you lose. Like success in social media, don’t broadcast when meeting people. Instead, engage with them. Deal with connections as human beings and don’t view everyone as only a potential prospect.

Here are five networking nuggets which can help you to connect better with others:

1. Focus on helping, not “getting the word out.”

Focus on a genuine interest in and desire to help others first. As you learn about them and their needs, you’ll find them more interested in you. You’ll also learn how you might be able to connect them with others so you have two fans, not just one.

2. Don’t give your card without permission.

Business cards are meant to help us stay in touch with important people. Forcing your card on them, or, worse yet, walking up to a group and systematically handing out one of your cards to each person (ugh!), is not the way to begin a sincere, mutually-beneficial relationship.

3. Follow up in creative, positively memorable ways.

Yes, it is appropriate to have a “good to meet you” letter or e-mail. However, for special connections, think of something more positive and delightfully different. If they mentioned a special restaurant they like, watch for specials or send a gift card. Sending a video e-mail is something I’ve done with EyeJot (EyeJot.com) with very good response.

4. Respond rapidly to requests.

When someone asks for something, make it your goal to respond rapidly. That means you need to have systems in place in advance. Have your Smartphone equipped to send important links quickly. Have important numbers and connections readily available so your rapid response is easy for you and extraordinarily helpful to others.

5. Remember and respond when someone helps you.

Susan RoAne, author of The New York Times best-selling book, How to Work a Room, says it very well: “You gotta’ know who you owe.” When someone does something for you, make it your mission to respond in an equal or slightly better way. If they tweet something about you, respond back with a few helpful, well-thought-out tweets. Make it your job to be proactive on helping others.

The best networking is about connecting to help. Focus on helping, not on “getting the word out.” If you’re only talking about yourself and what you do, people lose interest — really fast.

I hope “that guy” (and others like him) can read this and improve his helping. By helping others, he will be getting a better word out about him and his company.

MANA welcomes your comments on this article. Write to us at [email protected].